Good morning, Mamma. How are you going to stay close to your kidlets today? Where in your day will you have time to just be with them? I had twenty minutes over breakfast with mine on Wednesday, and twenty minutes at bedtime last night. This, if continued, is not a formula for a close family. It was also my reality these last two days.
This morning, I have to leave before seven AGAIN, so I’ll wake them up with a smile and then have to go (these are the mornings when it pays to have a full partner husband).
If I want to be close to my children, I have to spend time with them. REAL TIME. I had prepped them that this week was going to involve extraordinarily long days at work, so they were ready, but I still need to make it up to them tonight. And this weekend.
And I don’t want to hear they’ll be okay; this, if continued over time, they would most definitely not be okay. I love my work; I am grateful for my work; but I love my kids more.
I once thought to myself, “If I gave my work the same number of hours I give to my children, would I still be employed? “The answer, at that time in my life, was a decided no. I changed a great deal after that revelation. I do not want to be fired by my kids.
So. No book clubs for me. I lunch on the run. I order groceries (except for yesterday when I spaced it) and have them delivered. My dry-cleaning is delivered. I have a cleaning lady. My neighbor mows my yard for the cost of a coffee-a-day. Every thing that can be outsourced, is.
There are no prizes for doing it all. There is no award for the most independent (and miserable) woman.
Yesterday, I told my manager that I was taking a half day off to watch my daughter’s last race. This is a VERY high-intensity time at my work. But I missed her winning all-conference. I missed her high school Personal Best at the last meet. I’m not missing my last chance to see her run.
I took a chance in telling him what I was doing. I took a chance in valuing my kids. But we have to, Mamma. Work cannot always win. Your kids will not be here forever and they will not be ever-forgiving of always being prioritized after your work.
Plus, this is your LIFE. This is it. You don’t get to do it over after you make it to the C-suite and somehow magically have more free time.
Be strong, Mamma. Be brave. Be brave enough to go public with your devotion to your kids. You can still be a rockstar at work. Really, you can. Rock. Star.
But you’ll probably miss book club.